Training your slave with these hand signals...

Basics of Service

 The basic principle of submissive service in a public setting can be summed up in one word: Attentiveness.

Your behavior should reflect your attentiveness to the dominant's needs and desires at all times. Your role is to serve those needs and desires. Is your dominant about to light up a cigarette? Is your dominant's coffee cup empty or has the coffee grown cold? Does he or she need a chair to sit on? Does your dominant have special needs (physical challenges, dietary restrictions)?

It is your job to ensure that the dominant's comforts are served by making any and all appropriate arrangements to make the dominant's life easy. Similarly, it is your joyful task to demonstrate, through your attitude and demeanor, that the dominant's needs come first. Your ability to devotedly serve your dominant is a standard by which others will judge you AND your dominant.

Not only will your attentiveness please your dominant but it will impress those you meet both with your dominant's power and your submissiveness. In other words, you will be a submissive who a dominant is proud to own and one who others will believe is worth ownership.

Some submissives mistake their ability to take a heavy beating as the proof of their devotion. Certainly, it can be a highly erotic type of service to endure heavy pain for your dominant, but what about all those moments when your dominant isn't "doing" you? Are you as good a slave to her (or him) during the quiet moments as you are when your dominant is giving you what you crave?

The following guidelines will help you to convey to your dominant and others that your wish to serve is sincere.

Rules of Public SM Etiquette

1. Call a dominant by the title of her or his choice (e.g., Mistress, Ma'am, Master, Sir, etc.) If you don't know what his or her preference is, ASK.
2. Don't lunge at a dominant, stand too close to him or her, or thrust your hand out in greeting. Wait politely until the dominant greets you or initiates a handshake.
3. You don't need to act like a mouse but it is respectful to periodically lower your eyes in deference to the dominant.
4. The only person who has the right to give you orders is someone to whom you have consensually surrendered control. If such a person gives an order, an appropriate response would be, "Yes, Sir" or "Yes, Ma'am."
5. When an order is given, do your best to comply immediately.
6. If the order pushes a limit, either use your safe word (if you have one), or tell the dominant that you are having a problem and need to talk to him or her.
7. If a dominant wanna-be tries to order you around, an appropriate response would be, "I have not consented to this."
8. Anyone who tries to pressures you into service or tells you it is expected of all submissives should be avoided.
9. Basic rule of thumb: if someone is rude to you, you are under no obligation to be polite to them, even if he or she is a dominant. Clearly he or she is not a good one.
10. Open doors for the dominant and wait until she (or he) passes through before following.
11. Have a lighter or matches handy so you can light a dominant's cigarette or cigar.
12. If the dominant does smoke, discreetly empty the ashtray every so often.
13. Offer to fetch a drink for the dominant.
14. Keep an eye on the dominant's beverage glass and offer to get a refill whenever it is empty.
15. Offer to carry the dominant's coat, equipment bag, or other cumbersome object.
16. When standing beside your dominant, make sure to stand just behind his or her elbow, so that the dominant is slightly in front of you. (Note: some dominants may require that you kneel in attendance.)
17. Do not assume you may take a chair beside your dominant unless she or he has already discussed this with you. Wait until your dominant tells you where to sit. If the dominant gives you no instruction, politely ask where she or he would like you to be.
18. Avoid starting requests with phrases such as "I want" or "I need." Instead, ask for the privilege by starting with: "May I please" or "Mistress/Master, may I have permission to...".
19. If you are in a club or at a party, never bolt away from your dominant's side or give the impression that you would rather be anyplace else but next to your dominant. If something exciting is going on which you are dying to watch, or if you see people you know, ask permission to go.
20. No matter how attractive another dominant may be, when you are in the company of your dominant, control yourself and do not flirt or otherwise express untoward interest in someone else. Even if you are not yet collared or formally owned, if you wish to become owned, you will significantly reduce your chances by acting shallow.
21. Always remember to say "thank you" for every privilege your dominant grants you. For example, if you've received permission to do something, do not charge off like an animal just released from a cage. It gives others the impression that you couldn't wait to leave your dominant's side.
22. Do not argue in public with your dominant. If you are genuinely upset about something which cannot wait until you get home, ask your dominant for permission to discuss it privately and out of earshot of the crowd,

The Wild Rose – Nourishing the Feminine Dominant

~ written by Midori ~

Dominant, kinky women are frustrated, and not in the good way.  They are getting prickly and thorny.

Of course I don’t mean all dominant women are frustrated. There are those who are fulfilled, actualised and satisfied—but seem to be just as many who aren’t. I know this because, in the process of exploring and teaching the art and pleasure of sensual dominance, I’m often privy to the women’s concerns and dissatisfactions. The ugly truth is that many don’t feel heard, understood, appreciated or pleased.

Surprised? You’d think that a woman who has found pleasure in taking charge erotically would get what she wants. Put on the outfit, throw on the attitude and she can just demand for what she wants, right?

No.

There’s a whole lot more that goes into the blossoming of the happy dominant—there are development stages and an art to the cultivation of the feminine dominant which can be as challenging as the most prickly roses.
Each of us harbors vast potential for erotic desires, pleasures and personae, like a mix of mystery seeds within us. As we begin our conscious adult sexual lives, most of us aren’t aware of what our ‘seed packs’ contain. They may be daisies, wild flowers, night blooming jasmine, or belladonna. Rarely do we come equipped with only a single type of seed or a singular sensual predisposition. Even the most dominant woman or man has sensual expressions beyond that. To assume that a woman must conform to one flora type, or that all dominant women have the same flora type in common, is to utterly disregard her uniqueness from the get go. Does her complexity baffle you? Does she not fit your image of a dominant? If so, congratulate her in her uniqueness, for you have a very special rose. To treat these as flaws and letdowns can lead to her frustration and dissatisfaction.

Sadly, most of us let the world around us—parents, religion, media and peers—stick a label on our seed packet, and we blindly accept that as truth of our content. The potential of our libidinous flora is vast, but only if we bother to plant them in fertile soil. If the history of sexual politics is any indication, San Francisco, Seattle and Berlin are among the places with some of the richest cultural ‘soil’ for these seeds to germinate and sprout. These cultural environments provide mulch rich in permission and low in toxic shame factor. Seeds left too long in cultural or domestic environments high in the toxic mix of shame, guilt, judgment and oppression, seem to stifle growth and encourage black mold of bigotry to flourish. Various corners of online cultures also provide conditions that may be sensually rich, or depressingly barren. Sadly, at times of our erotic potential goes unplanted, like seeds left in the bag and forgotten, so we never get the chance to see what might come to bloom.

Let’s say that a woman has the chance to plant her sensual seeds in a lush environment, and from that sprout a range of pleasures, from sweet and gentle to ravishing, or even demanding and commanding. She has her initial thrills with engaging her dominance. Perhaps her lover’s permission made this fruitful condition possible, or maybe it was something she read, or a workshop she attended. Permission to explore is the starts this growth, but this permission alone isn’t enough for a woman to find full joy in sensual dominance. The Dominant hasn’t blossomed yet.

If the lover does nothing more than give permission, but doesn’t continue to encourage, celebrate and honor her explorations, it’s akin to forgetting to water the plant after it starts to sprout. Don’t expect that simply finding the initial spark of dominance is all she needs to instantly gain the confidence to know and get what she wants. She may be facing an entire lifetime of labels and expectations to overcome. It’s a vulnerable time where the growth could be stunted, embittered, twisted with resentment or even killed off. These things will happen if you expect perfection, total confidence, and full delivery of your fantasy. She is not your FemBot fantasy machine. She is a real woman. Keep in mind that without the proper nurturing even the most enthusiastic seedling can wither and desires crumble.

The proper nourishment of the budding dominant depends also on her own efforts to truly understand what pleases her. If she let’s others tell her what she should enjoy, whether that’s her lover or her newfound kinky community, she’s fallen back into unexamined passivity, and that’s not any sort of empowered state of dominance. Even if a woman is being bitingly bitchy and domineering, she’s demurring into angry passivity if she’s behaving based on what she thinks she’s supposed to do. She’s now effectively stunted or twisted her dominant growth potential.

She needs to examine deeply what truly makes her happy. Her lover or bottom can be an integral part of this by genuinely caring about her joy and actively engaging in dialogue with her on what thrills her. It’s tragically common for a bottom to simply assume that what they want is also what the dominant wants. Listen to her and nourish her with what feeds her desires. 

Tips for weeding out pretenders

I have come across a few 'submissive' males who find it hard to commit to Female Dominants

Initially they are all keen with the thought of sex being part and parcel of their service to you but when they find out that non-sexual service is the expectation, it doesn’t quite thrill them any longer.  Of course sex can be part of your dynamic but on your terms.

Tips for weeding out pretenders may include:

·         Morning and evening text by a set time

·         Write a short story/poem by a strict deadline.

·         Provide a face photo asap

·         Meet for a coffee or drink not long after communication has commenced



(100090)

Opinions on Service 3

From a Sister:

There are those who serve from a true need to do so, they derive their pleasure from pleasing others. They don't expect a "reward" as we think of it. Doing it well, and seeing a positive reaction IS the reward.

There are those who serve because of the person they are with and their desire to see that person happy. It's not a need they have, but something they are willing to do because it is desired by someone they care for. Those usually do need some form of payback, even if it's just positive attention and affection.

These may look the same, even sound a bit the same, but the motivation is completely different.

Then there are the tit for tat types...service is fine so long as there is always a reward / play after service is provided. Not my type, but I know of people who have made such arrangements as service of a particular form in return for play...it has it's place.


The sexual doesn't enter into it for me...I either want it or not, but it can't be earned. It isn't dependent on service.

Opinions on Service 2

From a Sister:

I have more than one sub and all of them contribute some service to our varying relationships (I'm poly, but the relationships vary because everyone is different).

One is a polyamorous partner (secondary both ways), decades-long dear friend & lover, and occasional service sub. He installed eyebolts to start my playroom, has moved heavy goods, and has plans (which I need to nag) to fell a tree in my yard this winter.

One is a service sub who volunteered for my garden and yard needs, and the range of chores has grown and become seasonal. We get together usually once or twice a week; he'll deal with his chores/projects, cleans up, and we have a play date. (He also loves to experiment with new toys, contributing to both our fun!) He's great fun to play with, we both leave smiling. I find our relationship style that of service top & service bottom.

And another sub is only present a few weeks of the year; when he is present, however, his relationship is closest to that of the mythical "twue subbie" (TM pending). His desire to be of service to me is quite literal; what can I do to make my lady's life easier? Sometimes he fetches me something to drink before I ask; sometimes he works on my antiquated house wiring. And sometimes he just squats quietly next to me at a play party so that he can observe and anticipate what I'll need/want next. Carrying toy bags? Opening doors? Cleaning toys? It works for us.


I love them all, in different ways. ;-)

Opinions on Service

From a Sister:

I define "service" as any non-sexual, non-play, service provided by a slave or submissive. everything from a massage, to cleaning the cat box.

I have in the past had play-only relationships, however I do not currently have that dynamic with anyone. I expect partners to provide service at some level, even in a play only relationship. Carry the gear bags, set up, tear down, general fetching of anything I might want or need.

I have a full time live in slave who is a service slave , as well as a "play partner".  Having come from a primarily play-only type background, his diving into a full-time service position has been a journey to say the least.


Rewards for his excellent and thoughtful service, as first and foremost, expressions of thanks, or gratitude, as appropriate; secondly, rewards of types of play he enjoys, or even rewards of a more vanilla nature.


I do not feel I am dependent upon his service, as I am able to do those things for myself when I so choose. However the joy of having a service slave is that those things are done to make my life easier.

PROTOCOL (guide/suggestion to create your own)

How the protocol should be undertaken? / How do you expect the submissive to act?

How do YOU expect the submissive/slave to behave:

How to address you in public and private

How to dress in public and private

How to sit / Where to sit in public and private

How to serve in private

How to eat / When to eat

How to shower / bathe

How to groom for your Dominant

How to greet you in morning / evening

How to behave in public

  

This is a model for the relationship. It is the Dominants' responsibility to establish the protocol. DO NOT send your submissive out on the net looking for that “magic” protocol that must be followed.  Create your own protocols from the above, and add more as your experience grows.

FemDom Face Slapping video

FaceSlapping Vid

Now peeps, be careful of the ads and pops up.  Just exit out of them.  And make sure you have your anti-spyware program update on JUST IN CASE!

This video is fucken awesome!  I think I am going to incorporate this into my future plays.  Yum!

FemDom game...

This is a wicked fun game to play at FemDom gatherings.

You take 6 implements or devices of punishment and number them 1 - 6...such as:-

1. Paddle
2. Crop
3. Cane
4. Single Tail Whip
5. Bare Hand
6. Flogger

The sub/slave rolls one dice and the number determines the implement to be used.

The sub/slave then rolls a pair of dice and whatever number the sub rolls determines the number of strokes.

Isn't this a delightful little game.  Something I may incorporate into one of my events next year.  Thank you to the devious mind of the Mistress who came up with this fine entertainment.  

And... 46 more ideas to make your slave feel owned (loved)

61. For transgressions: Command that He is to be silent for a week. He may not speak, and will take whatever pain or pleasure You give as silently as possible.

62. Treat him like a pet in front of friends, making him present himself, turn himself, etc.

63. Give him a writing assignment: "The definition of Obedience - 1000 words"

64. Have him wear a toe ring.

65. Tell him one morning that He must cum for You 15 times that day, and then write about the day.

66. Have him wear nipple clamps under him clothing out to dinner.

67. On Your birthday, let him receive Your spankings.

68. Spend time training him how to move gracefully to please You.

69. For transgressions: stand him in the corner like a 3 year old.

70. Always flog him after completion of a task, even if it was satisfactory. A well flogged slave is a happy slave.

71. Speak about him as if He were not present.

72. For transgressions: deny him any D/s at all for a week.....letting him do just as He pleases, not allowing him to serve You in any way, no punishment, no instruction, no play, banning titles of respect, etc. This will shame him and certainly make him strive to please You when it is over and He is in him place again.

73. Defend him honor to those who would disrespect Your prized possession.

74. Pet him often.

75. Make him be webMistress for Your huge site, DallasBDSM. hehehehe

76. Whenever possible (i.e. no young-uns about), have him sleep in a cage.

77. Buy him sexy or slutty clothes to Your liking.

78. Teach him things....expand him knowledge.....in a patient Fathimly way.

79. When You are away, call him and have him masturbate for You.

80. If You choose to play with othims, make sure Your slave knows who is first in Your heart.....and that some things are just for him.

81. Remember him birthday.

82. Lead him with a loving fist in him hair.

83. Wake him each morning with an assigned task for the day.....and make sure it is done by day's end.

84. Teach him patience.

85. Videotape Your sessions and watch them togethim.

86. On long trips, have him wear double dildo latex underwear.

87. Hand feed him chocolate.

88. Have him place him regular wear shoes in a line by the front door. They should be in a straight line with the laces tucked inside, or the buckles buckled. Inspect them periodically.

89. Keep a list of him transgressions in a little book....let him slip for a while...thinking You are not noticing.....then one day, bring out the book and have a day of atonement.

90. Tickle him just because You can.

91. Have him be perfectly still and quiet while You bring him extreme pleasure.....when He moves or makes a sound punish him then return to the pleasure.

92. Keep him locked in him collar when You are home. You place it on him.....having him kneel. Wear the key to the lock around Your neck.

93. When possible, have him cook and serve Your dinner wearing nothing but an apron and collar.

94. Buy him a Polaroid camera and give him assignments to take pictures of himself for You in certain outfits or positions, etc.

95. Remember to kiss and caress away him tears.

96. Don't be afraid to bring him to tears, for they are Yours as well.

97. Take him and the dog to the park, both on leaHes.

98. Caress him, whisper into him ear that You love him, nibble on him belly, lick him thighs and make love to him until He cries.

99. Have him fall asleep with Your cock in him mouth and tell him You expect it to be There when You awake.

100. Occasionally, fulfill him fantasy.

101. Dominant's word is the last word.

Addendum

102. Make sure that He is safe at all times....when with You and when You are apart (to the best of Your ability). Keep him vehicle in good working order, make sure He has emergency money and a cell phone to call for help if needed.

103. Be consistent.

104. Take the time to talk to him.....learn him fears, him dreams and fantasies. Use Your knowledge.

105. When You go out of town, forbid him to shave him sex. Shave him Yourself when You return.

106. Specify exactly how He will address You in private and in public.

107. If You are willing to correct him each time He forgets until it is a habit, have him refer to himself as "this slave" or "this girl" etc. 

Subspace

Subspace (also sub space, headspace, flying, or floating), in the context of a BDSM scene, is the psychological state of the submissive partner. The term is unrelated to the mathematical term subspace.

Subspace is a metaphor for the state the submissive's mind and body is in during a deeply involved play scene. Many types of BDSM play invoke strong physical responses. The psychological aspect of BDSM also causes many submissives to mentally separate themselves from their environment as they process the experience. Deep subspace is often characterised as a state of deep recession and incoherence. Deep subspace may also cause a danger in newer submissives who are unfamiliar with the experience, and require the dominant to keep a careful watch to ensure the submissive isn't placing him or her self in danger. Many submissives require aftercare.

Physiological Processes

During the scene, the intense experiences of both pain and pleasure trigger a sympathetic nervous system response, which causes a release of epinephrine from the suprarenal glands, as well as a dump of endorphins and enkephalins. These natural chemicals, part of the fight or flight response produce the same effect as a morphine-like drug, increasing the pain tolerance of the submissive as the scene becomes more intense. Producing a sort of trance-like state due to the increase of hormones and chemicals, the submissive starts to feel out-of-body, detached from reality, and as the high comes down, and the parasympathetic nervous system kicks in, a deep exhaustion, as well as incoherence. Many submissives once reaching a height of subspace will lose all sensation of pain, as any stimulus causes the period to prolong.

Some Simple Guidelines for a Dominant

• Safety first. Shit happens, be prepared. Always.

• Try to make sure your sub suffers no non-consensual harm. If it happens, apologise.

• Try to respect everyone, not just your fellow dominants. Manners go a long way.

• Try to avoid doing the ultra kinky shit whilst totally and utterly hammered. Bad things may happen when you don't have your full faculties.

• You're in charge, behave that way.

• Recognise that other couples do things differently and acknowledge you DON'T have all the answers.

• Try to use common sense at all times.

• Show discretion.

• Don't take things out on your sub. If you have a problem, communicate with them. Most problems can be solved by simple communication.

• You are human and not perfect

(93170)

Ideas for degrading fun

From one of my online boys from many years ago... just sharing, and please feel free to try the ideas...

***

I'm always looking for creative ways for my Mistress to degrade me when she doesn't feel like having sex but is amused by my need to orgasm. 

Following are seven ideas for our play. Would love to hear what you think and have you add your own suggestions.

1. Red Light, Green Light. Have him start and stop masturbating on command until he cums.

2. Mistress Says. He must follow every command that begins with “Mistress Says…” For example, order him to strip, play with himself, twist his own nipples, bend over and show you his ass, spank himself, get down on all fours and show his thrusting technique and of course, “Mistress says cum!” Your choice if he has to lap it up or not.

3. 10 Seconds: He has 10 seconds to make himself cum on your command, or he goes to bed hard. He’s not allowed to touch his cock till you give the 10-second command, but you can decide how much other non-cock stimulation/teasing he receives before you tell him “Go!”

For example you could have him stand naked before you with his hands on his head and his legs spread and you can tease and torture him as your mood dictates. If you don’t feel like touching him, you can order him to perform various acts on himself similar to those in Mistress Says before his 10-second countdown.

4. Lap it up: Order him to masturbate onto a plate and then get down on all fours and lap it up till it’s all gone. Explain that if he doesn’t do it, he won’t have sex or be allowed to masturbate for a week and at the end of the week, he’ll just have to jerk off and eat it, or face another week of denial.

5. Look Mistress No Hands: Ram a dildo in and out of his ass and make him cum without touching himself. For added spice, tie his hands and/or make him lap it.

6. Give him a buzz. Order him to lay perfectly still (or tie him spread eagle if you prefer) and apply a high speed, powerful vibrator to his cock and balls. When you find the spot you like, just hold it there and let the tension build till he explodes. If you’re feeling wicked afterward, continue to use the vibrator on his manhood till he screams and begs you for mercy.

7. In Your Face. Have him lie on his back with his ass in the air and his legs jackknifed to his shoulders so that his cock is pointing down at his face. Stand over him for the best view and have him jerk off into his waiting mouth.

More CBT fun

    Various methods of crushing (not totally of course!) the balls. Pliers, car battery clamps, a "visible ball crusher" I bought on-line etc.

Various abrasives - sandpaper, nail file, scrubbing pad, electric toothbrush etc.

Candle wax

Clothes pins and binder clips

Use a Wartenberg wheel

Butterfly board and other "play piercing"

Stinging nettles  - use first on the nipples, then the balls, then the shaft of the cock and finally - exquisite agony - the glans.

Crushed chillis in virgin olive oil "painted" on the cock and balls (I read about this online somewhere and it said that it's "initially, excruciating but later blissful" which was true. What it didn't say was that the "excruciating" part, with your cock and balls feeling like they're on fire, lasts an eternity - or it certainly seems like it - before you get to the "blissful" part)

Bengay / Icy Hot (similar effect to the above, but hard to get rid of that distinctive smell)
Electro torture, using a TENS unit.

Various anal "probes", including electrified.

Wear tight jeans without underwear.

Figging – ginger root.  Cut the ginger root to the size of the tooth pick and insert it in the urethra.

Sounds, can be a lot of fun

Attach a row of pegs to his cock with a string running through them all. Attach a small bucket to the string and let it dangle between his legs. Keep slowly dropping small weights into the bucket. Eventually the pegs would start to come off but it will take ages and then they should all come off suddenly.  Painful.

Wrap his cock in a sheet of sandpaper and put rubber bands around it so it remains rolled up. Hold one end of the sandpaper and have him pull his cock out.  It will leave scratch marks all around his cock. Ouch.

Sadistic but indulgent

This test was undertaken in 2010.  I wonder how I would score in 2014...

You Scored as Sadistic but indulgent You like to see Your slave in pain. And to reach this goal, You like to use many different tools like whips, clamps, crops, strap-ons or different kinds of bondages. You will make Your slave suffer, as long as it's consensual. Sadistic but indulgent 92% The Trainer 85% Fussy and demanding 81% Teasing and "bitchy" 80% Kinky and sex driven 78% Psychologist 76% Lifestyler 68% Extremely sadistic, twisted and pitiless 67% Possessive and controlling 64% The Player 63% Humiliatrix 59% Cold and distant 55% Female supremacist 44% Loving, caring and with submissive tendencies 43%

Alex Chapmon - FemDom Artist

Alex Chapmon Artworks

Alex Chapmon is one of my favourite artists.  Alex focuses on African American Female Dominants and has an amazing range of creative works.  Please feel free to click on the link above to the website: Artbreak, and view his impressive range of Women, and men.

30 MORE ideas to make your slave/submissive feel Owned (i.e. loved)

31. Have him keep a diary of his journey into submission.

32. Instruct him that he may never get himself something to eat or drink in Your presence without first asking You if You want something.

33. Some evenings, keep him on a leash and take him with You no matter what You do....even if You do not speak to him or include him in Your activities.

34. When appropriate, he is to speak when spoken to.

35. Reward him by giving him delicious pleasure.

36. On occasion, share him.

37. When it suits You, instruct him not to make eye contact with You without Your command.

38. Have him keep his body clean shaven at all times.

39. Conduct random inspections of his body to make sure he keeps himself to Your specifications.

40. Make him wear a butt-plug under his clothes whenever he goes out alone.

41. For transgressions: have him write Your name on the bottom of his foot and tell him to remember he is walking on You with each step. (This is harder to do that You might think....)

42. Dominant the art of the meaningful piercing stare.....

43. Give him reading assignments.

44. Test him on the reading assignments, to make sure he learned the appropriate lessons from each.

45. Instruct him to keep his toenails painted perfectly everyday, and check to see that they are before bed.

46. Make it his responsibility to put the toys away after play and punishment, and to keep them clean and neat.

47. Reward him by letting him name his favorite scene, toys, etc.

48. Call him Your slut, Your pet, etc.

49. Have him make a list of the 10 things that make him the most self-conscious, uncomfortable or embarrassed.

50. Work with him, having him do the things on the list (if possible), so that he conquers those fears and hesitations.

51. Sometimes, pamper him.....wash his body and hair, having him remain perfectly still as You turn him and move him about.

52. Hand feed him like a small child on occasion.

53. Have him eat from a dog bowl on occasion.

54. For transgressions: make him wear a sign to the next public function naming him crime. (ouch)

55. Praise his dedication when he has pleased You well.

56. Instruct him that he is never to touch Your body without permission.

57. Have him write a meditation about him submission, devotion and trust in You....to be said aloud each night before falling asleep.

58. Some days allow him no clothing whatsoever (when practical).

59. For transgressions: deny him play. No pain for you, bad girl....hehe.

60. In the same ilk, for transgressions: deny him orgasm.....give him sex, but He can't cum.

Reasons for males wearing Chastity Belts

Control your submissive/slave's orgasms. This is an extremely powerful and effective relationship device that would prevent him from masturbation.

Psychological comfort for the keyholder: You will never fear him to have sex with someone else.

Domestic obedience: His home will be on the top of his priority list. You will find him helping with the chores.

Tease and denial: Kiss him passionately, tease him, deny his sexual pleasure as long as possible. The results of this denial will be extraordinary.

Total Commitment and Loyalty to his Mistress/Dominant.

***

What are some other reasons, followers?

Female Archetypes

A summary from a recent discussion about the various female archetypes.  A  work-in-progress.

Amazon/Protector/Heroine:

These are women who put their family and community first. They may have different methods but their end motive is the same that those who belong to them are safe and looked after. Some charge into the front lines of battle while others guard the children and the home. Many may see the women who go to the forefront of battle as less feminine than others as they are not afraid to take on a more vocal and stereo-typically masculine role to liberate and protect those that cannot defend themselves. Many of the gods of the world's ancient religions began their lives as heroes capable of great feats of strength or skill. 

The Heroine is also a classic figure in ancient Greek and Roman literature, often portrayed as one who must confront an increasingly difficult path of obstacles in order to achieve authenticity. Today this archetype holds a dominant position in the social mind as an icon of both male and female power, from the Superheroes of comic books, such as Superman and Wonder Woman, to television and countless movies and popular novels. In the classic Hero's Journey, defined by Joseph Campbell and others, an individual goes on a journey of initiation to awaken an inner knowing or spiritual power. The Self emerges as the Hero faces physical and internal obstacles, confronting the survival fears that would compromise his journey of empowerment and conquering the forces arrayed against him. The Hero then returns to the tribe with something of great value to all.

Femme Fatale / Heartbreaker:

These ladies are highly skilled at manipulating to get what they want without getting emotionally involved. They know the power of their sexuality and are not afraid to use it. They tend to be selfish and emotional sadists that will take everything a male has to give and give as little as possible in return. Aware of all her males strengths and flaws, his agenda, priorities, and goals, she takes that and turns them to her own purposes.

The Geeky One:

She is the female counterpart to the Geek Sub simple as that. A nerd/geek in her own right, there is more than one way she will beat you. In the dungeon and on all your gaming high scores. This dominant loves sci-fi, fantasy and all that it contains as much as any male. It is of high probability that she will make you role play Spock to her Luhura (the new film series). She loves all things nerdy and might just get wet when you talk about building PCs or programming or physics and other big scientific words. She likes to win, like most gamers, so arguing with her is probably a moot point. Never forget that there are splendid tortures in high fantasy.

The wild thing:

She is youthful and mischievous and could have come from the children's book where the wild things are. She is prone to primal urges and loves to bite and be bitten so long as you do it how she says. She will randomly pounce her boys when they least expect it and torture them with tickles or spankings or wrestling. She usually likes animalistic intense sex, but don't think she is going to clean up the mess her shenanigans make. That's what she keeps you for. --> She is a bit of a handful for some.

Healer / Energy Play:

The Healer archetype manifests as a passion to serve others in the form of repairing the body, mind, and spirit. It expresses itself through channels other than those classically associated with the healing of illnesses, and so you need to look beyond the obvious definition of what you "do." You can be strongly guided by this archetype in any occupation or role in life. Some people, by their very nature and personality, are able to inspire others to release their painful histories or make changes in their lives that redirect the course of their future. Essential characteristics include an inherent strength and the ability to assist people in transforming their pain into a healing process, as well as having the "wiring" required to channel the energy needed to generate physical or emotional changes.

The Nurturer/ Loving Domme / the Care Bear:

The doting, affectionate dominant woman who takes their submissive under their wing. She is sweet, kind and overall cuddly but that doesn't make her weak. Her will is the law of the land. The main punishment (or funishment) for disobedience is the knowledge you broke her heart and made her sad with your willful misconduct. She believes you should serve because you respect her and want to make her happy. Not because she forces you to. She loves all kinds of playfulness but gives her own sensual twist to activities that are often seen as more severe. -> This type of Domme will see that you are harder on yourself than you can be. She will enjoy recognizing all that is good and help you bring your best self forward. You may find her enjoying "Mommy" role play.

The guide / teacher:

She firmly takes her sub by the hand and leads him down a path to enlightenment where he can become all he was meant to be. All he must do is follow her lead and embrace what is within. She can see you the man inside the child and the submissive inside the man. She encourages him to be all he can be both in the nilla world and in their private world. She is an expert at helping him find both, ether though a path of pleasure or a path of pain the choice is his. --> The teacher may not see the role as a permanent arrangement and may seem aloof or uncaring. She recognizes that she may release you the day that you have learned what you are willing to. She will not tolerate 'games' with her affections or her Dominance. Expect pop quizzes on her rules when you least expect it but also, she will allow you to make mistakes so she enjoys your begging for forgiveness later.

The Guide takes the role of Teacher to a spiritual level, teaching not only the beliefs and practices that make up established religions, but also the overarching principle of seeing the Divine in every aspect of life. Clearly you do not have to be a professional Preacher or Guru to have this archetype, as we can all learn to lead others spiritually through developing our own intuitive spiritual awareness and passing on whatever we have learned with genuine humility. To count this archetype as part of your support group, however, you will need to discern in your life a continuing pattern of devoting yourself to teaching others from your own spiritual insights. This presupposes that you have gained wisdom through some combination of self-disciplined practice and study and perhaps spontaneous spiritual experiences. Wisdom also comes with age, and so the Crone or Wise Woman represents the ripening of natural insight and the acceptance of what is, allowing one to pass that wisdom on to others.

Pet Owner / Fox Hunter:

This archetype collects pets, whether it is a stable of ponies, guard dogs, cuddly kitties, or more exotic types. She expects devotion and obedience, caring for her pets needs and training them to her standards. She likes to own and control animals, and mold them to serve and please her by performing tasks and tricks on command.

Female Supremacist:

This archetype is all about female superiority, male inferiority. Men are the enemy and the best place to keep one's enemy is in chains at one's feet. She is a master of degradation, considering mere humiliation too kindly for her tastes. For some Feminists, their role is based on science and less on ideology.

The Y chromosome is a weak and malformed version of the X chromosome.

While the X chromosome contains 1,098 genes, the Y has a mere 78. Therefore, men are less than women.

Women live longer.

Pound for pound of muscle, women are stronger.

Women have a higher pain tolerance.

Larger corpus callosum in females shows that their brains are superior.

Acknowledgement to:  loreoflove for her efforts in condensing the archetypes from a recent FL discussion.  Thank you.

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